Bachelor Party

Every new day it dawns upon me that I will not be a bachelor anymore. The shadow of marriage looms large and it is not long before I would be stripped of the privileges I now enjoy as a single man. In my case, it is still not as bad since mine will be a love marriage. As they say, I am acquainted with the enemy :). But for people who just wake up one fine morning and realize they have been un-bachelored, I can only imagine the scene in Braveheart where Mel Gibson shouts "Freedom!! Freedom!!". Ironically even the movie name applies, Braveheart.

Making this transition from bachelorhood to martyrdom easy for us are our friends. Those faithful few who will soon join us in the chasm. They know what we will miss behind enemy lines and they try to make it up for us through a rite as ancient as earth itself. I believe the only guy who didn't get a bachelor party must have been Adam himself. After his experience, he must have had a clue how important it is. I do not wish to deconstruct this rite since almost everybody knows what transpires in it. Booze,Grooves and Boobs form an essential part of it. You booze, some babe grooves and you can imagine the boobs part for yourself. But there is more to it than just this. What it represents is extremely important. It represents the difference between being a bachelor and being finished. It is cliche to say this but when you are single, you actually are free. You may be lonely, famished, disorganized, end up cooking a pathetic dinner daily wishing somebody to be there in your life. But you are free. You are free to remain unshaved for weeks, free to be dirty and unkempt, free to ogle at girls, even free to be lonely. Now that is freedom isn't it. Free to be lonely. Believe me your better half won't let you be lonely ever. Now when you are a bachelor you are free to booze as much as you want, groove to whatever music you wish with whoever you wish and free to whatever with the boobs part.However one doesn't end up using this freedom or rather abusing it. We live as meek men most of us busy in our schedules and work. We fantasize but we don't execute those fantasies. And as meek men we move from bachelorhood to being married. Whatever chances there are of realizing those wild fantasies when we are a bachelor are completely lost in marriage. A bachelor party is a chance to make at least a fraction of it all come true. It is that one night when you live like a free man, your wild fantasies sanctified by the trinity of booze, grooves and boobs. And when you do make the transition, it is one night you will always remember and you will always remember your friends who stood by you in that phase of your life. As I eagerly await the night when my friends would throw me a bachelor party, there's just one thought that crosses my mind. How pissed is my fiancee gonna be when she reads this blog?.

Fuck It !!! Let's go bowling

You'd probably know what the title of this post means if you have seen "The Big Lebowski". For the uninitiated, I would urge you to watch this awesome movie at least once. As a background, the movie revolves around a simple bum who calls himself "The Dude". His true name is Jeffery Lebowski, however he prefers being called "The Dude" simply because he considers himself to be the dude. Now "The Dude" is unemployed and has no family as such. The only people close to him are his friends Walter and Donny from the bowling place where he frequents. The plot is such that "The Dude" gets involved in the kidnapping of the mistress of another Lebowski who is stark opposite to "The Dude". His friend Walter who happens to be a Vietnam war veteran tries to help him in this enterprise. Now for Walter everything is connected to the Vietnam episode. He even relates the death of Donny to it in a hilarious climax to the movie.

So it happens that Walter badly screws the situation every time he tries to help "The Dude". But while "The Dude" is terribly upset about it, Walter is totally unaffected and says "Fuck It man, Let's go bowling". Initially when I saw the movie, I was very irritated with Walter and the way he screws everything like a dumb person. However even then these words of his and the way he says them made me laugh. Having thought about it I realized, that no matter how badly we screw anything in our life, we should also just "Fuck It and go bowling". That's what they end up doing in the movie. They actually go bowling as if to indicate that life is all about the ups and downs , about the screw ups we are responsible for. However there is no point in sulking about it. We should accept it and move on or like they said go bowling.

Now my best friends visited me a few days back. This was after a long time that the three of us were together and decided to have a ball and where else to do it than the best city in the world, New York. It was a trip we will always remember and cherish. It was almost like the city was equal to our enthusiasm and our eagerness to have all the fun that we could in a single day. And yes we eventually did go bowling. The idea then was nothing to do with the movie or about what I have mentioned above. Although in retrospect I believe each one of us was least bothered about issues that matter to us everyday. It was like in that one hour of bowling we forgot everything. Even the concept of winning. None of us was bowling to win. We were bowling to curve the ball or to try tricks with it and we thoroughly enjoyed much more than we ever had. No matter how badly we had screwed up things before in our past, how many bad choices we had made or how many sins we had committed, it was all lost in that one hour of plain and simple bowling. We were like three best friends oblivious of everything else around us. We didn't actually say it before we thought of bowling but we did mean it though in a very subconscious way.

Things are going to be different for each one of us now. The future seems uncertain as always and worse still, marriages loom in the very near of time. I am already engaged while the folks of my friends have started a search for their brides as they helplessly watch. While every other thing remains uncertain as to how life proceeds, I do believe that even if we screw things badly as Walter did, we wont worry much about it. We'll just say "Fuck It man, Let's go bowling".

A place under the sun our own, our own

We lie side by side on a thin blade of grass
Far away from the world entire.

A sweet smell fills the night air
Endowing it with a freshness that is almost alive

The waters of the stream flow with a quiet rhythm
While the moonlight dances on its surface

There's a music in the air
A music being played only for us

We see the stars twinkling at a distance
As they gaze upon us from the heavens above

In that moment of bliss you hold my hand
I clasp it gently and look into your eyes

In the silence of that night our souls speak
You never utter a word and say 'I Love You'

I can read your eyes to know i need not answer
A wind blows through your face

Caressing it with a gentle touch
You look like an angel then

And my heart knows it can love no one else
Far away from the insanities of our mind

Our hearts speak the language of love
In that brief silence we feel the gaze of God upon us

We feel his satisfaction and content
Hand in hand we lie on that thin blade of grass

As the night progresses towards day
Far away from the world entire

In a place under the sun our own,our own

I Stand Alone

I stand at the edge of a cliff, overlooking the vast limitless sea.
Looking down I see the waves crashing against the rocks and then receding back.
The wind blows against me with its majestic force hurling against my frame.
The Sun shines bright and tries to unsettle my gaze.
I stand alone.

My mind surpasses the sea in it’s vastness.
The peace in my heart mocks the wind.
The dreams in my eyes shine brighter than the sun.
The blood in my veins rivals the waves.
I stand alone.

I stand alone and see the power of God.
I stand alone and see the humility in that power.
I stand alone and see the beauty in that power.
I stand alone and see the might in that power.
I stand alone.

I see a reflection of it all in me.
I stand alone in the image of that power.
For a moment I look up into the heavens and feel the gaze of God.
This here is my temple and my life is the worship that I offer.
I stand alone.

I stand alone and see what can be achieved with that vastness.
I stand alone to live my dreams.
I stand alone and acknowledge the truth that is me.
I stand alone and envision the journey that lies ahead.
I stand alone to create my destiny.

I offer no hope , I offer no strength.
I draw no hope, I draw no strength.
With every realization of my soul I stand alone.
With every atom in my body I stand alone.

Till I meet life’s horizon I stand alone.
In the memories that will remain of me , I stand alone.

I stand alone.
I stand alone.

TO AP

I Love You.
I Love you and I will Love You.
Even if time draws itself between us,so that you forget me,I will Love You.
Even if fondness grows too scarce,so that you hate me,I will Love You.
Even if destiny unfolds itself such,so that we stand apart,I will Love You.
Even if the universe schemes against me,so that i am left alone,I will Love You.
Even if the heavens betray me,so that i stand helpless,I will Love You.
Even if sanity leaves my mind,so that i go mad,I will Love You.
Till the last of my breath,I will Love You.
Even if death takes me by hand,I will Love You.
I will Love You for the reason that you are
I will Love You for no reason.
With every breath i take,I will Love You.
With every thing i feel,I will Love You.
I will Love You because I am You and You are me.
I will Love You because I Love You.

"If love could be measured how would you measure it.Can you write a mathematical equation to
define it." Sri asked.We were sitting in Cafe Coffee Day sipping our coffees distinctly away
from the very crowd that surrounded us in that place.As i was thinking about his question i
wondered. Can one write an equation for the randomness of our thoughts when we hold this
drink in our hands.Can we actually predict the outcome of that gray part in our brain while
sipping coffee.It wasnt hard to realise that it depended more so on the person you are
having coffee with.In fact it doesnt depend at all on the coffee."Tell me" Sri
interrupted."What do you think?.Can you or cant you".Sri is a great friend of mine.We have
been close friends for quite sometime.Apart from our common love for mathematics we share
other interests as well like for example sipping coffee in this crowded place.Sri was
actually scoffing at me by his question.Partially he was telling me.You cant tell me the
answer to this since you have never loved anybody and are so impervious to love.And if you
dont know what love is how can you mathematicize it.I smiled at his waiting, growing
impatience.I was ready with an answer.

Love At First Sight

Love At First Sight

The bus stop was crowded enough and so was his mind. Crowded with the thoughts of a beautiful face that he had met a month ago. She looked so beautiful that day dressed in elegant pink smiling down upon him. It was love at first sight .It surely was love for it had lasted one long month and still showed no signs of leaving.

The rushing passengers trying to board the arrived bus interrupted his thoughts. Our man too got in. After all this was what he had been waiting for. The earlier overcrowded, old rattling bus had suddenly turned into a heavenly chariot that took him to his beloved. Not only was this the reason for his love for the bus but also this was the very place where he had first met his love. He had been seated next to her and lost in his thoughts of social reform, which young men usually are in, when just occasionally he had turned sideways to look into this epitome of beauty. Instinctively almost instinctively he had asked,” What’s your name”? And it had begun from there. Every day from that day onwards they had met, coincidentally for her but sometimes a coincidence is well arranged. He had found every possible reason to meet her. One rainy day he had stood outside her office building waiting for her to come out just to have a glimpse. Though there had not been any rain that day, but then the effort was more important.

Surely it was love, there had to be no doubt. Today he was going to propose her for marriage. He knew it was a bold step but then he would have her for always. For the past four nights, he had had no sleep although he had travelled a lot. He had travelled with her to the golden deserts of Andaman and Nicobar and the lush green valleys of Africa. Well geography was not a major issue in love. Even the desert sand would feel like snow with her. Oh how much deep can a person fall in love?

He had already thought of where they would marry. Back in his village in Bihar where he knew his friends would envy him so much. They had all been married to village bumpkins whose beauty lasted only a day or two after the marriage. After which they would either turn out to be deaf or handicapped. After all their parents had to dispose them off. In India it is common practice .In fact parents pay money to the bridegroom for taking away their daughters.

But our man was not like all. He was a young enthusiastic Indian youth who believed in bringing revolution into the society. He loved only the girl and not the money. Though he did not earn enough for himself, he was sure she did. As far as love was concerned it didn’t matter much who earned more. He was in love, true love that was more important.

Busy with these thoughts, he just looked sideways to find out the whereabouts of the bus. At that very instant he thought he had seen an angel. Sitting next to him was the most beautiful girl he had seen in his life. Dressed in an elegant pink she looked like a goddess. Instinctively, almost instinctively he asked, “What’s Your Name?”.

-Anupam Tyagi.